Chris Kringle Inc Filed Bankruptcy Over Antique Toy Cars - By Lance Winslow

By Lance Winslow

Santa Claus Corporation Out of Business Due to Increased Taxes After Socialist Expenditures

Unfortunately, there will be no Christmas this year because Santa Claus Inc. is filing for bankruptcy. The company could not make its loan payments, or cover its costs this November. The taxes at the North Pole have skyrocketed to pay the interest on that debt due to Socialist-liberal expenditures and runaway debt spending. The CEO of Santa Claus Inc. noted that the increased taxes on the businesses at the North Pole have crushed the community's economic vitality.

Polar bears and Eskimos alike are waiting in line for the government to give them potatoes. The elves will now be laid-off from the Santa Claus factories after Mr. Claus was unable to get stimulus monies because he was not "too big to fail" and because Christmas is no longer politically correct. Both the House and Senate had cut the Santa Corporation's addendum to the bill on the second round of Obama Stimulus.

Most of the elves don't understand because they voted for President Obama because he promised them that he would fix the economy, provide jobs, and support their union. Unfortunately, the North Pole has the highest unemployment rate in the nation. There are more people unemployed by percentage than in Detroit Michigan. The Santa Claus said;

"I don't understand what Congress was talking about, we build cars up here at the North Pole also, albeit toy cars, but they get a lot better gas mileage than any of the cars that the big three automakers produce. The new springs we've engineered really make them wind up and go like hell without any gasoline nor do you have to push them like the Fred Flintstone toy cars of the 80s and 90s. Still, Congress refused to discuss providing us with a bailout package."

Mr. and Mrs. Claus are very upset, and they are too sad to attend the business auction where they will be auctioning off the famous Santa's Red Sleigh. The 150-year-old company will close its doors prior to Christmas delivery this year. Mr. Claus, that's Santa to you, had one last comment; "the kids who voted for President Obama should have been more careful what they'd wished for."


By Lance Winslow